Why Love Isn't Unconditional, It's Selfish As of July 20, 2017 What has three years of toxic "love" towards my first lover taught me? You're doing it all wrong. Love is selfish. Stop fooling yourself otherwise. 1. You don't love them, you never did. You Just loved the idea of them. Don't deny that you haven't thought of how much you "had in common". How quirky they are; How they looked when they laughed. Or even how sexy they were with their passions. But lastly, How you saw a future, A potential spouse. You get creative with what life would be. Look. You don't have much in common. You're focusing on a dimension of them. Similarity does not equal capability. It's selfish because you're looking for something you're comfortable with: You. YOU are looking for familiarity. YOU were f...